Do you ever wake up angry and you just can’t explain it? That is until you start walking around the house after your husband watched the kids last night (while you were working) and realize that things are in total disarray? Then you think about when he asked you yesterday what you did all day (while he was gone fishing), almost in a tone that says “wow this place looks like shit WHAT did you do all day?” The fact that your daughter finally decided to do her laundry last night but didn’t put it in the dryer, then when you open the dryer to put her clothes in you realize that she put YOUR clothes in the dryer and not all of them belong in the dryer. Then you look outside as you are coming upstairs from the laundry fiasco to see that she left the baby stroller outside last night and it rained. There are dishes to be done, diapers to wash, oh yeah and number 3 decided to pee in bed again, so that means stripping the bed AGAIN and washing everything on the bed AGAIN, which really means two extra loads of washing because you can’t wash it all at the same time. No wonder I can never get ahead on laundry! Then there is payroll that needs to get done while I try to breastfeed a clingy baby all day. Don’t get me wrong, I love my family, they just drive me a little crazy sometimes. I find myself getting more and more frustrated as I walk through the house; drink glasses left on the table, baby food (that I took the time to make for the whole week) got left out on the table (which means I have to make a new batch for the whole week), jeans left on the chair, sweatshirts on the couch, no clean towels left in the house… It goes on and on. Everything that I need to get done today is not stuff that is visually noticable so when the husband gets home today from taking number 3 to hockey practice he’ll probably ask “what did you do all day” and I’ll probably take it the wrong way and blow up. Some days a girl just can’t get ahead!
5:08AM. Molly wakes up to eat. “OMGoodness, I have to get up in like 20 minutes, ugggh”. I plop her on and let her eat while I drift back into slumber for the few more minutes that I can. My bed is so warm, the house is so quiet, I’M SO TIRED.
5:48AM. After pushing the snooze button on my phone for the third time I come to the conclusion that, yes, I really do need to do this now. But it’s so cold and I’M SO TIRED.
“Get up, get up, get up, get out of bed Tiffany, just get up… OK I’ll get up already!”
I lay Molly back in her crib and cover her with her fuzzy warm blanket.
I drag my sorry but down the hall and into the kitchen to start myself a pot of coffee. It couldn’t possibly brew any slower but I did it. I’m awake before 6AM and I’m out of bed. So it’s 30 minutes later that I had hoped for but baby steps, right?
So, now that I’m awake, where am I going to start? Maybe the leaning pile of papers on my desk? Maybe I’ll read? Maybe… I’ll just enjoy sitting in my office, drinking my coffee and enjoying the silence while it lasts…yup that sounds good.
I am not a morning person. I’ve never been a morning person, my (older) kids learned at a very young age how to make themselves a bowl of cereal and turn on cartoons so that mommy could sleep a little longer. Well we no longer have cable and we have four children, so cereal and cartoons are not really an option anymore. I have been saying to myself that I need to just get out of bed and get my day rolling much earlier. When I get up earlier I feel like I have more time to get myself going before the kids rise and all hell breaks loose. Most days I feel like I fall out of bed and then I’m falling behind all day long. Maybe this is why my motivation levels have been way down.
This morning was no different than any other Monday, I wake up, lay in bed as my mind is telling me “just get up dummy, you can do it, get up, take a shower before everyone else starts waking up and needing something from you”. But I didn’t get up, I lay in bed trying to get just a few more minutes in.
Finally I get up because little man is looking for underpants, look at the clock and realize it’s go time and I need to get him off to daycare before the phone starts ringing. I rush out the door in my pajamas, with my wild morning hair and get him to daycare before 9:30. Once I get back home my plan was to take a shower and get ready for the day. As I write this I am still in my pajamas. I attempted at making myself some breakfast but between the baby trying to eat, the phone ringing and sick kids down the hall I finally managed to make some juice and a peanut butter sandwich. This is my life, every day I’m rushing around trying to get everything done and nothing seems to quite go right.
I need to get up earlier!
As an effort of procrastination (something I’m really good at doing) I went on to zen habits habits. I found something about motivation and read that a good way at motivating yourself is to publicly announce that you’ll be doing something to keep you accountable. So here it goes…
I will get up, out of bed by 5:30 am every day for the next 2 weeks!
Sundays are typically my slow down day. A day of rest, peacefulness (as much as possible with 4 kids in the house), and family time. I wanted to create a photo series but was unsure where to start. I see a lot of blogs using instagram so it sparked me to jump on the band wagon. Introducing Slowing Down Sundays, a quick glance at the week via instagram! I hope you enjoy a snapshot at my week (although these photos are from the whole month).
You can also follow me on Instagram!
I just got a phone call from our “computer guy” and it’s not good news. We had an external hard drive, something that I was putting all of our digital images on thinking that I was doing the right thing by taking them off the memory card and putting them in a safer place so as to not get lost. Well… that was a horrible mistake. Apparently an external hard drive is not the safest place for your photos, especially if that external hard drive gets bumped or damaged in any way. The valuable lesson that I learned isn’t necessarily not to put photos on an external hard drive but to actually do something with those photos. I haven’t really printed any pictures off in about 3 years. Maybe I was waiting for the time to become available for me to sit down and print out only the ones that I want. That time never presented itself and now I have no pictures of my home birth. I have no pictures from last Christmas or of Avery’s first communion. There are no more images from the last two years of birthday parties or summers at the lake.
I had listened to a podcast the other day about accountability which is really hitting home right about now. It talked about how everything that happens in your life (good things or bad) you are accountable for, you made them happen. The thoughts and actions that you have put out in the universe you have to be accountable for. I have been telling myself this for the past few days, especially when I dented my van because I was in a hurry; yup I made that happen by not being patient and by not being totally prepared. When my 4 year old misbehaves (because he typically gets everything he wants) and acts like an a-hole when he doesn’t, yup I made that happen too. It’s like when I make an effort to understand and ask God to help me to understand what it means to have accountability in my life he throws me this fast ball. Losing all of my images because I am not more organized really feels like a sucker punch to the gut. All the time I’ve wasted on Pinterest I could have been editing my images, making photos books, or at the very list printing off my photos off at Wal-Mart. I do feel like I could just puke all over my keyboard right now.
So what have I learned from all of this? 1) There is never enough time to get everything done perfectly, but perfect sucks! Perfect sucks because right now I have less pictures of my kids because I didn’t have time to make them perfect. 2) Print off your f-ing pictures, right away, as soon as your event is done because weeks, months, years may go by and you’ll end up losing them. 3) Pull yourself together Tiffany! It’s time to get more organized, do something every day to get closer to a manageable level of organization because this fly by the seat of your pants everyday routine sucks. 4) Thanks God for iPhones and Instagram!
I have been trying to figure out how to incorporate videos into my blog in hopes that it will help me post more often. I have been away for the past few months because I’ve been busy trying to figure out how to juggle business, house maintenance, shuttling kids and sleep deprivation. I post often on Facebook and Pinterest because what else do you do while you’re breastfeeding?
We have done some remodeling in our house for the past few weeks, turning our former living room into a office and a bedroom. This involved putting up a wall, adding a door in the hallway, a bunch of electrical junk and painting. Woof. It seemed like my house would never be back in order, so I decided to have a party. Things got done really fast and now I have my very own office to decorate whichever way I choose! Anyway, my point is, I now have an office space all to myself and I am hoping to dedicate some time each day to my blog.
I spent most of today home alone (well Molly was here) and instead of cleaning like I would normally do if I were home alone, I learned how to make and edit a video on my iPad. Believe me it took all day due to the phone ringing nonstop and random drop ins! It’s very simple so don’t judge me too harshly because after all it is my first one. Hopefully I’ll continue to get better at the video blog over time. You can find me on YouTube!
Today I did it, I put on my skinny jeans and they zipped AND buttoned! I did a little victory dance in the bathroom and continued with my morning. It isn’t a great surprise to me because I was able to fit back into my pre pregnancy clothes all around the two week marker. I didn’t mentioned all of the goodness spilling out of my jeans and they are not by any means comfortable but they fit! I feel like that is a step in the right direction.
I’ve been doing a few exercises (only recommended by my midwife) and trying to get my back strong again by doing some of the physical therapy exercises given by my chiropractor. I’m anxious to start working out but I’m so tired that I don’t think it is a good idea at this point. I have a post pregnancy yoga workout that I will probably start doing in the next few days. I’m really excited and motivated to get back into shape!
After I had Willie it took me a long time to get back into working out regularly and I never felt like I got into shape. Sure I lost the weight fairly easily but I never had that defined body that I wanted. Eating habits had a lot to do with it and we were really focused on our business development at the time. Will and I both gained a bit of weight during the first few years of owning our business. Now I feel like I am comfortable with my contributions at the ballroom and better able to juggle things at home.
I have an appointment with my midwife next week and I’m hoping she will give me a thumbs up to begin a workout routine!